What Will They Remember?

There is so much talk this time of year about creating magical moments for our children...of gingerbread houses, making homemade ornaments and building snowman. And that has me wondering what will my children remember of this time in their lives? What memories will come to mind.."when I was five, when I was in 3rd grade, the year I was 10?"

As I look adoringly exhaustedly at my demanding, complicated charming, compliant monkeys I think back to what I remember when I was their age.

StinkBug is nearly 5. FIVE. How did that happen? Just a month after Christmas he will be a whole hand. He will go to kindergarten in the fall and in the blink of an eye he will be tying his shoes, getting his driver's license and leaving home.

Although I am forty-something twenty five my 5 year old memories are a bit fuzzy...black and white. This is back before HD memories.

My little brother was born when I was 4 1/2. I am DAMN sure that my parents had him to give me the REAL LIVE BABY I had always dreamed of. My Gran was visiting from New York and I remember sneaking up a back staircase with her, my dad, older sister and another grandma and little girl. We had to be really quiet but it was hard not to giggle with excitement. We came to a huge window with rows and rows of babies wrapped up tightly in blankets. We were able to get a quick glimpse of my Bubba before a nurse shooed us away.

That August-about six weeks shy of my 5th birthday I headed to kindy. I was painfully shy. I would excitedly take things for show and tell each week but I wasn't bat shit crazy enough to raise my hand and TALK. IN. FRONT. OF. THE. CLASS.

Somehow mom and Mrs. Chittenden figured out my game. There was this amazing giant shell that use to sit on my parents stereo

Before boom boxes & ipods this is how we listened to music

I was so excited to take it and hide it in my desk for no one to see share it at school. Apparently, Mrs. C and my mom had a conversation and figured out that while I was taking show and tell each week I was cowering at my desk clinging to my prized possessions was not in fact participating in the hooplah. I nearly peed my pants when Mrs. Chittenden called me to the front of the room.


I remember coming home from kindergarten and finding my mom sitting in dad's brown pleather recliner feeding the baby with the tv blaring.

Five was the year my parents gave me a real live baby to play with and that talking in front of others scared the pee outta me.

Peanut is 8 and in the middle of her third grade year. She is eight going on 18 with newly pierced ears and Talyor Swift cd's.

What defined me in 3rd grade is that my best friend's dad died.

I remember the crowded memorial service on what must have been a college campus. We were in an enormous room like the one we had visited on a class field trip months before when her dad had laid on a bed of nails and done all sorts of other mind blowing experiments and demonstrations. He had been a university professor.

I had to go to school the next day and I was pissed because G. & I were partners in the 3 legged race for field day. She wasn't there because she didn't have a daddy anymore and I was partnered with someone else. I was mad that Bobbie Jo refused to practice with me and I don't even think we finished the race.

Looking back her mom must have sunk into a deep depression. G. pretty much lived with us for awhile. She and I quit going to school though I am not sure for how long and I don't even know if we ever went back. We would sit at the round table in the kitchen and do our school work while my mom supervised. We rode our bikes with banana seats (mine was purple) to the corner and met my sister after school.

Third grade was the year I learned that daddies sometimes die and life changes forever.


Einstein is 10 and starting to take over the world. He is extremely literal, analytical and sarcastic. He will likely be the next Chief Justice of the United States or a Pro Bass Fishermen. Or probably both and also a whole lot more.

When I was in fifth grade my best friend's mom married my uncle.

 Do you need to go back and read that one again?

They moved from the Bluegrass state to the Empire State. We went from seeing each other every second of every day to seeing each other twice a year. I gained a step-aunt and step-cousin but lost a best friend in the process. My aunt had died of breast cancer the year before. She left two teenage sons and an eight year old daughter. I am pretty sure they weren't looking for a new mom or for their dad to get married again so soon. It was a weird year. Since first grade our lives had been so intertwined. It was hard to tell where one started and the other began. On her last day of school the teacher invited everyone to share stories and memories of G. All of them included me. I tried to figure out how to navigate 5th grade without my other half. It sucked.

Fifth grade was the year I learned people leave and relationships change...not always for the better.

What do you remember when you were the age your children are now?